Wednesday Randomness

Oh come on,admit it,you've wondered. And if you've discovered any of the answers feel free to share!!
1.Why are the obituaries found in the "living" section of the newspaper?

2.Why do they sterilize needles before lethal injections?

3.Why is a person who plays the piano called a painist but a person who races cars isn't called a racist?

4.What hair color do they put on the drivers license of a bald man?

5.What if you're in hell and you're mad at someone? Where do you tell them to go?

6. If mineral water has been trickling down for millions of years why does it have an expiration date on the bottle?

7.Why do we say an alarm clock is going off when it is really going on?

8.Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?

9.whose cruel idea was it to have the leter 's' in the word lisp?

10. How can something be "new" and "improved"? if it's new, what was it improving on?

11.If laughter is the best medicine, who's the idiot who said they 'died laughing'?

12.Why do people say "heads up" when you should duck?

13.Why are women and men's shoe sizes different?

14.How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?

15.If there's an exception to every rule, is there an exception to that rule?